Zack And Miri Make A Porno

Saturday, April 25, 2009


Few things before I start this review. 1, I'm a fan of Kevin Smith movies. I like his irreverent and insane sense of humor. But his character and plot development is weak. I like him, but that doesn't mean I won't scrutinize him. 2, when I sat down to watch this movie, I was far from being in the mood. My beloved cat Charlie died young and unexpectedly the day before I watched this movie. Yeah. I was not in the mood to be entertained, and I had my doubts that I'd be drawn in to the film. So I braced myself.

And to my surprise, I enjoyed it as much as anyone possibly could with their cat having died the day before.

A few complaints. This definitely falls under the "rom-com" category, but the "rom" part can be a little hard to believe. Seth Rogan's character Zack is so off beat and sex obsessed that his brief and not so smooth transition into lovesick fool rings a little insincere. Several jokes with Elizabeth Bank's character Miri would have worked much better if Elizabeth was not in fact gorgeous. And I'm sorry, the scene where all the actors pitch in to pay for the utility bill was just sloppily written, and a little *too* hard to believe.

But when Kevin Smith falls, Seth Rogen will catch him. This movie is hilarious, and while the material they were given is excellent, its Seth Rogan's
performance that ties it all together. While he's spouting off his lines, you hear the typical Kevin Smith schtick hidden within, but Seth brings a breath of fresh air to the delivery. He makes it work and he makes it unique. That is no easy feat. Smith often writes his character's lines from the same perspective. Sure, there are exceptions (is anyone quite like Jay and Silent Bob?) but for the most part, it seems as though Smith has spent little time trying to write from the world view of a well thought out character. What we wind up with is a litany of carbon copy neurotic losers who act as a mere vehicle for Kevin Smith's inner rants.

Luckily, Seth completely compensates in this area. He makes the movie well worth watching.

Jason Mewes was delightful and I liked seeing the depths he can go to now that he's sober. It wasn't an Oscar worthy performance (or role for that matter) but it was enjoyable and reminded me that he is in fact talented. Craig Robinson (who seems to be playing the token black dude a lot lately) actually *gasp* plays a slightly different personality for once. A cameo from Tisha Campbell-Martin as his wife was both hilarious and terrifying.

I'm not fond of Elizabeth Banks, and as I said, a lot of the jokes and the story would have made more sense if she wasn't so pretty. But she was competent in this film, and managed to bring a spark of individuality that most Kevin Smith heroines aren't given a chance to develop (for instance, Rosario Dawson's in Clerks 2 felt stale and uninspired, and I often wondered if Smith had given a single thought to character motivation when he wrote her.)

Over all I give this film at least a solid B plus. This is the best Kevin Smith movie since....well, at least Dogma.

Dragonball Evolution

Wednesday, April 15, 2009



"The legend comes to life"

THEN THEY FUCKING KILLED IT!!!







Ok, so I decided since I've been on a Dragonball/DBZ/DBGT kick for the past few weeks, I'd check out this film. I've been a HUGE fan of the manga and anime since I was a kid.

Now, I went in with somewhat low expectations.

But... dear fucking god, it was even worse then I expected!

Ok, so to start, the things I didn't hate(since it's a very short list).

Piccolo's voice was pretty much spot on, and he looked somewhat like I imagined a real life version of him would look.
Yamcha's voice, also SPOT ON.

uhhh....
Goku seemed like Goku in two short parts of the film, once where he is stuffing his face(as he tends to do in the series) and then when he is taunting some kids fighting him.

Master Roshi was still kinda the pervy Master Roshi we all know.

That's... it.



The rest made me so angry I don't even know where to begin.
Bulma was a "badass" WHAT THE FUCK. Bulma is supposed to bitch and moan the whole time. She's not badass, she's supposed to be annoying. She doesn't fight, she screams and runs.
Yamcha is supposed to be afraid of girls... not smooth... and not... blonde.
Who the FUCK is that chick supposed to be with Piccolo?
There is virtually no action and when there is it's like the director REALLLLLLY wanted to be Zack Snyder and failed terribly.
Goku does not meet Chi Chi in high school and WTF why is she so nice?! Where is the stubborn Chi Chi we all know and love?!?!?
Did these people who made the film even attempt to read the manga or watch the series?!
HOW does Goku transform without his tail.
Why does Piccolo have control over him when he transforms?
Why does he transform at an eclipse and not a full moon?
why do the dragonballs show him the future?
Why is this movie only an hour and 20 minutes? You know what that is in DB time? Shit if it were realistic, they'd be powering up the whole time.
Why does Goku and his grandfather Gohan know about the Nameks? And why are they all concidered evil? Piccolo and Kami don't find out who they are and where they come from until the Vegeta saga in Z, and Nameks are peaceful!!!!!!


There is no character development.
What the fuck happens to Piccolo.
THE DRAGON IS SUPPOSED TO FILL UP THE SKY, MAKE IT GO BLACK, AND BE FUCKING BADASS.
Not this dinky little lame ass thing.








There'smore.


A lot more.

But fuck it. I'm done, I just wanna wash my brain out with some bleach.





In fact, I'd rather stare at this for an hour and 20 minutes:



-gAk-

about this blog

Welcome! You have stumbled upon the greatness that is my movie review page.

Most movies these days totally blow, and I am here to tell you which ones can suck it dry. In addition I will also review movies that kick my ass and then make passionate love to.


READ.

follow me, for i am your leader

the people who write this crap

  © Blogger templates Shiny by Ourblogtemplates.com 2008

Back to TOP